Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Then you guys just all showered together...?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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