i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
