I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
