Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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