I wish life had little blips of pornography
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize