Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
