Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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