she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize
