My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
