i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
