no. you can't hotbox the world.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
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I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
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Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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