well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
