you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
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That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
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Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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