kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
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