I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
