I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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