so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
