Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
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