So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
