you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
