dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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