i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
His hands were made for my vagina.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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