3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Randomize
