You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize