So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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