You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
