i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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