All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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