i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
