Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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