I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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