Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
