And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
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