This girl is more easily done than said...
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Green mimosas i think yes
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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