We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
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