You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
only you would photoshop your dick
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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