She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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