From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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