census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
