I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
meet me or not, i'm out of control
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize