This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
