I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
