If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I wish there were birth control emojis
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
