i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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