The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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