i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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