Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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