The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize