In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
