butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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